Dear besties,
If green is the new black and gay is the new green, then that must make New York City the new gay.
Whatever. Anyway, what I mean to say is that, according to an article in the inimitable, hard-hitting news org Time magazine, the Big Apple is greener than the Green Mountain State. But how is that possible? I mean, I’m no Bill McKibben or anything, but Vermont is the essence of green. We invented green. Green didn’t exist before Vermont cooked it up in a secret underground lab.

This is what environmentalists look like in New York City. Not really. It’s a giant rat.
Time gets this little morsel of highly inflammatory information from someone named David Owen, who apparently wrote a book smearing Vermont and praising New York City for being environmental stewards on par with John flipping Muir. Owen’s new book Green Metropolis: What the City Can Teach the Country About True Sustainability posits that New York City is the greenest city in America. Um, has he ever been to Queens? Just wondering.
In a September 24 Q&A with Time transcriber Claire Suddath, Owen calls out Vermont for not being anywhere close to green. By Owen’s standards, we’re not even chartreuse or aquamarine. We might as well be soot colored.